Ever had a bad day? Ever had a bad week? Month? Year? Life? Eh, shake it off and keep going. Why? Because this is the only day, week, month, year and life you will ever have. Can it be any worse than what a man named Jesus lived on his last day? Or what his mother had to so helplessly see near the sidelines. Only a few can relate, but we all have bad days.
I had a bad a day few days ago. It went a little like this:
9:00am I call my friend to see if she is ready for our 5K run. “My son is in the hospital. We’re not sure what’s wrong. They are running a number of tests.”
9:30am Student at work sends me an email. It reads something like this “My husband has been diagnosed with cancer. I need to drop my classes. Is it possible to get a refund? We can’t afford to pay the out of pocket fees.”
10:30am My professor emails me and tells me I have to rewrite one of my papers. All I can conceptualize from his email, “YOUR WRITING SUCKS!” “THIS IS NOT WHAT I WANTED!” “REDO, REDO, REDO!!”
11:00am I close my office door and I cry my eyeballs out. Self-doubt pays me a visit.
11:30am I email my classmates to ask for their assistance. They provide me with encouragement and positive feedback. I feel a little better. I show Self-doubt to the door.
12Noon My thoughts, “Must be a sign to not go to the southland. I might as well plan for another weekend alone with my computer, books, and notes. I hate this program!!!”
2:00pm My supervisor says the student can’t get a refund and I have to break the news to her. I feel like an ass!!
3:30pm Another email from my professor.
Professor: “I haven’t received your powerpoint presentation for tonights’s webinar.”
Me: “We aren’t scheduled to present until next week.”
Professor: “You both signed yourselves up for tonight’s presentation and tonight is the last webinar for this series. Send me your presentation ASAP.”
After checking the calendar and my dates he is RIGHT!!! SHEEEEEZZZOOOOO!! I haven’t even read the book yet!!!
3:31pm I close my office door and cry my eyeballs out. Pinche Self-doubt! She didn't even knock this time.
3:35pm I rush home for my notes and book.
4:00pm Get home. I have two hours to prepare for the presentation over a big piece of chocolate cake, pickles, blue cheese stuffed olives, chocolate chip cookies and soda. Self-doubt and her friend Binge Eater follow me home.
6:00pm Presentations last for two hours. Shaky voice and all I get through it. Go home Self-doubt and take your friend Binge Eater with you!!
8:00pm Open a bottle of wine and soak my sorrows.
Yes. I know what your thinking. Not as bad as what Jesus or his mother went through, or even what my friend or the student are dealing with. I agree. Tomorrow is a new day. Self-doubt and Binge Eater please stay away!!!
Sigh. Doubt sucks. Let's banish it to a place very far away.
ReplyDeleteAmiga querida: I used to wonder why God put so many challenges in my life. Why did I have to go through all the things I did. And you definitely know some of them. First, I applaud you for crying, and sharing. If you don't, it eats up at you. Second, God does not put on your path what s/he does not believe you cannot handle. This is what I call LOVE and PERSEVERANCE. You have love and compassion for others, have it for yourself. Self doubt may knock on the door, but you can open and immediately shut it when you see who it is.
ReplyDeleteYou sound like you handled yourself very well! I LOVE YOU. And so does GOD and JESUS CHRIST.